Offerings (Anne)

When I transferred from BYU to a Midwestern university, I enrolled in Institute. I was 22 at the time, and was returning to church activity after a horrific engagement to a boy who did not share my faith (and was an all-around awful person). I loved the Institute teacher, and I always felt like he “got me” in a way my religion professors at BYU did not.

Three years later, I returned from my mission, and a boy who I thought had waited for me broke my heart in rather devastating fashion. When Institute classes started, and that same teacher asked me questions about my mission and how I was adjusting, I told him about the boy and my fear that I would never get married.

My teacher said, “Maybe being single is going to be your Abrahamic trial.”

I wanted to punch him.

That was 13 years ago, and apparently, that Institute teacher was somewhat clairvoyant.

But I think of his analogy every so often, especially when I do things that I consider sacrifices. Trying online dating: an offering. Going to a single adult conference, where I am the youngest person in attendance by at least 25 years: an offering. Continual church attendance despite feeling like a complete freak: an offering.

Offering after offering on the Altar of Please-Don't-Let-Me-Die-Alone.

Last weekend, I attended one of those single adult conferences. I could only make it to parts of it, and really didn't have a chance to mingle much, but I went. And in the opening prayer of one of the speaker events, the pray-er asked that we would be blessed for our faith in attending.

I was so touched by that idea—that by going to the conference, by myself, knowing not a single soul could even be considered an act of faith.

I enjoyed the speakers (Barbara Thompson was one of them) and the one workshop I was able to attend before I had to leave for another obligation. I didn't see anyone close to my age. And yes, I know I probably shouldn't be age-ist, but I'm just not ready to date men closer to my father's age than mine.

I did not have enough faith to attend the dance.

But I laid down an offering just the same.

The Need for Speed....(marnie)

So I’ve been absent for awhile…had a little health issue that left me under the weather for several weeks. So my interaction with “potentials” has been really limited. When you have a goal to “get out there,” it leaves you feeling a little down when you can’t make any real efforts. But I’m on the mend, so watch out potentials!! I’m coming!!

Enough of the pep talk to myself…

I went to a Singles Conference this last spring and participated in the very popular “speed dating” activity. Personally, I’m an advocate of speed dating! I think it’s a great way to force a meeting, a conversation, and a very comfortable environment to exchange contact information if it desired on BOTH ends of the conversation. The only draw back is that you must have a good basis of quality individuals participating – or you walk away from the experience more hopeless about ever meeting someone you could ever see yourself having at least a 20 minute conversation with and not wanting to poke your eyes out from the pain of it.

Ok, that’s a little dramatic but that’s my gut feeling….

I’ve done this speed dating thing a couple times now and haven’t had a whole lot of success after 10 interactions each time. But this last time had one potential that I wasn’t absolutely overjoyed with, but I thought he was normal enough to maybe enjoy an evening out together.

At this particular speed dating activity the ratio of women to men was heavier, so I “shared” a guy each time with another really cool, quality girl name Sam (name has been changed to protect the innocent). As we gave all our spiels about ourselves in the 5 minutes we were given to each guy, I really thought she was such a catch! And would be so fun to hang out with! I started racking my brain trying to think of someone I could set her up with! Because of that feeling, there was absolutely no jealousy or even trying to outdo each other to get the guy’s attention during the 5 minutes. It made it more casual and more enjoyable for me.

Anyway back to the only potential…we’ll call him Speed…I got an email from the Speed Dating Administration telling me that Speed was interested in going out with me. So I thought, well, that’s cool! I’ll email back permission to contact me. I got Speed’s email yesterday.

He started out really well by remembering the current book I was reading at the time. He even sent picture drawing of the classic book’s main character, which I thought was pretty thoughtful. Then he included a picture of himself so I could remember exactly what he looked like. I thought that was very kind too. And he’s pretty darn good looking.

After a brief bulleted list of where he lived, what he did for a living and his religious status (active, with calling), he added two references: his bishop and the family he home teachers with their respective phone numbers.
Hmm. References? Thoughtful? Yes. A little weird? Yes.

I have mixed feelings from it. But I really shouldn’t. After some of the online dates I’ve been on – and some of my friends have been on – it really is a good idea! I guess the reason I don’t like it is because of the circumstances. Really? I have to check out a date before I go out? I can’t meet a guy at a party have a good conversation and have him ask me out and go out with me? Instead, I have to check his references? Make sure he isn't a felon or lying about his activity in the church? Yeah, sad. But that’s what you get from speed dating!

But I’m going for it! I haven’t decided whether I’ll call the references not. But I will go out with Speed if he asks.

Stay tuned for more Speed….