At a meeting I attended a while back, the speaker was talking about change and then gave the example from the Book of Mormon about Moroni: Alma 49:8-9 "But behold, to their uttermost astonishment, they were prepared for them, in a manner which never had been known among the children of Lehi. Now they were prepared for the Lamanites, to battle after the manner of the instructions of Moroni. And it came to pass that the Lamanites, or the Amalickiahites, were exceedingly astonished at their manner of preparation for war."
Basically, Moroni outwitted and out-thought the enemy and it brought them success in their endeavers and saved the lives of the people.
I was intrigued with the whole idea of changing the ways of war and how it had such a successful outcome! My own thoughts had been contemplating how the last year and a half went in my struggle to date and find people to date. My circle of single friends was dwindling and the only place I could think to meet new people of my same religion was at "single adult" activities I would hear about through email and the internet. Those activities were quite scary at first, but with perseverance, I got really good at them - meaning they didn't scare me. The only problem was that I wasn't meeting the kind of people I wanted to date at these activities.
However, this story of Moroni and the Nephites inspired me!! I decided to change the way I did war (aka social life)!! I knew I needed a change anyway, so I decided to move up to the single adult ward - a place I had been avoiding for some time. And that change was a great infusion of energy to me! There is nothing like getting out of your comfort zone to help you make changes in your life. It's hard and scary but well worth it! And now I have a whole new circle of friends and dating possibilities...it's refreshing and it's helped me keep my hope alive for the future.
And this whole idea of changing the ways of war has inspired me to try to date differently as well. Things I used to do with The One and Rebound, I'm not going to do with the others I date. Because it didn't go the way I wanted with them, so why repeat the past? I'm trying to do everything different (kinda like George Constanza did on that Seinfield episode). And so far the experiment has gone pretty good!
Its hard though, because now I feel like a complete beginner and I'm not sure of myself at all. I'm trying to change how I flirt, when I flirt, the type of guys I flirt with or put energy into, the type of communication I have with those I'm interested in, the amount of communication I have with them, how often I make myself available for a date, and the list goes on and on. But old habits die hard with me and in the often intimidating world of dating and relationships, doing something you are used to is what my instinct is.
But alas! I shall change! I shall shake things up!! So, the pledge of a my last blog is another attempt to do things completly different than before. And I'm not sure there is a perfect way to flirt and date. But getting out of old habits and doing things that scare you completely spitless, just may help you get to a place you need to be to meet a great guy and start a new relationship.